Santa Barbara Divorce Attorney & Family Law Lawyer

QUESTIONS? CALL US.

(805) 879-7523

Seven Guidelines for Parents Who Are Divorced/Separated and Sharing Custody of Children During the Covid19 Pandemic

Mar 19, 2020 | COVID-19 Pandemic

1. BE HEALTHY.

Comply with all CDC and local and state guidelines and model good behavior for your children with intensive hand washing, wiping down surfaces and other objects that are frequently touched, and maintaining social distancing. This also means BE INFORMED. Stay in touch with the most reliable media sources and avoid the rumor mill on social media.

2. BE MINDFUL.

Be honest about the seriousness of the pandemic but maintain a calm attitude and convey to your children your belief that everything will return to normal in time. Avoid making careless comments in front of the children and exposing them to endless media coverage intended for adults. Don’t leave the news on 24/7, for instance. But, at the same time, encourage your children to ask questions and express their concerns and answer them truthfully at a level that is age-appropriate.

3. BE COMPLIANT with court orders and custody agreements.

As much as possible, try to avoid reinventing the wheel despite the unusual circumstances. The custody agreement or court order exists to prevent endless haggling over the details of timesharing. In some jurisdictions there are even standing orders mandating that, if schools are closed, custody agreements should remain in force as though school were still in session.

4. BE CREATIVE.

At the same time, it would be foolish to expect that nothing will change when people are being advised not to fly and vacation attractions such as amusement parks, museums and entertainment venues are closing all over the US and the world. In addition, some parents will have to work extra hours to help deal with the crisis and other parents may be out of work or working reduced hours for a time. Plans will inevitably have to change. Encourage closeness with the parent who is not going to see the child through shared books, movies, games and FaceTime or Skype.

5. BE TRANSPARENT.

Provide honest information to your co-parent about any suspected or confirmed exposure to the virus, and try to agree on what steps each of you will take to protect the child from exposure. Certainly both parents should be informed at once if the child is exhibiting any possible symptoms of the virus.

6. BE GENEROUS.

Try to provide makeup time to the parent who missed out, if at all possible. Family law judges expect reasonable accommodations when they can be made and will take seriously concerns raised in later filings about parents who are inflexible in highly unusual circumstances.

7. BE UNDERSTANDING.

There is no doubt that the pandemic will pose an economic hardship and lead to lost earnings for many, many parents, both those who are paying child support and those who are receiving child support. The parent who is paying should try to provide something, even if it can’t be the full amount. The parent who is receiving payments should try to be accommodating under these challenging and temporary circumstances. Adversity can become an opportunity for parents to come together and focus on what is best for the child. For many children, the strange days of the pandemic will leave vivid memories. It’s important for every child to know and remember that both parents did everything they could to explain what was happening and to keep their child safe.

Press Release prepared by Judge Dianna Gould-Saltman
Los Angeles Superior Court and adapted by the writings of several leaders of groups that deal with families in crisis:

Susan Myres, President of American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML)
Dr. Matt Sullivan, President of Association of Family and Conciliation Courts
(AFCC)
Annette Burns, AAML and Former President of AFCC
Yasmine Mehmet, AAML
Kim Bonuomo, AAML
Nancy Kellman, AAML
Dr. Leslie Drozd, AFCC
Dr. Robin Deutsch, AFCC
Jill Peña, Executive Director of AAML
Peter Salem, Executive Director of AFCC

Subscribe to Our Blog


 

How Is Spousal Support Determined in California?

Divorce can be an emotionally trying time, especially when legal and financial matters are considered. Spousal support, better known as alimony, often is a pivotal aspect of divorce settlements, designed to ensure the financial stability of the lesser-earning spouse...

How Does Mediation Work in a Divorce?

It’s not always easy to consider divorce as a journey you’re about to embark on since no one plans for or expects a marriage to end. Divorce can be daunting since it often carries a negative connotation. This is often from the process of litigation and its downsides...

How Long After Mediation Is Divorce Final in California?

Going through a divorce can be an unpleasant and stressful experience for the individuals involved. As such, it’s understandable to want your divorce to be finalized as quickly as possible. Mediation is a solution that can simplify the process of a divorce because it...

How Does Mediation Work in California Divorce?

When considering separating from your spouse or partner, it is important to remember that you have options. Mediation is an alternative to litigation and may save you time and money in your divorce. Many assume that they must turn to the courts for the dissolution of...

Navigating the Legalities of Pet Custody in California

For many Americans, pets are cherished members of the family. These beloved companions bring comfort and unconditional love into our daily lives. However, when human relationships dissolve, questions about pet custody can become emotionally and legally complex. In...

What Is Considered a High-Asset Divorce in Santa Barbara?

The decision to end a marriage and file for divorce is difficult and emotionally devastating. It can overwhelm many people who wonder how they will care for themselves and their families in the wake of potential financial disputes. When a divorcing couple has a large...

Dividing a Business in a Santa Barbara Divorce

Divorce is a complex and arduous process, especially if the couple owns a business together. Santa Barbara business division takes time to complete, and you may find yourself struggling to understand the small intricacies. California is a community property state,...